February 2025 Week 4

Ok so i’m going off topic, however real life is always on topic because traveling with all of you helps me live life as best i can, even if its a correction after learning the lesson.

They say an issue will keep coming up until it has taught you all the lessons you need to learn. Hmmmmmm! I am once again being presented with the lesson of impatience and willful control and direction. However, different than my usual path, I am leaning into patience and acceptance more, totally surprising myself lol.
Now lets back it up.. December’s intention was -Pause what a pleasure- which I thought would be helpful for all of us around the holidays however, if you remember, I came back from an extended holy pilgrimage trip and rolled right into fear and uncertainty around my health, even though it was my five year anniversary of my cancer. A week leading up to Thanksgiving, during and the week after in early December I lived in fear and having to wait for my tests to be completed and the results. Life kept asking me to wait and January’s intention moved to - the stillness we seek comes from within - which was an attempt to start the new year off a little bit slower and intentionally and embracing the slower pace to do a little self discovery. Now for this month - I Enjoy Spending Time With Myself -which I have absolutely loved!!! We travelled a lot in January and finally the end of January and the first half of February I was at my home enjoying all that my home has to offer me in the winter, even with bonus snowstorms! It was a much needed reset before starting our journey across the country.
“An intolerance of uncertainty is an important contributing factor to all types of anxiety.”

Now for the lessons!!! We started with a loose itinerary south, then west to CA and almost immediately, during the route planning, the challenges and lessons started. One of our first stops west came with us having to be more certain than we had planned, but we pivoted and made a path according to the “guidelines (for lack of a better term)” set in place for our stop. Now we started to put this plan into action first by bringing a relatively new truck in for an oil change and tire rotation. This proved to not be routine and we sat in uncertainty all of last week wondering if we would launch as expected last Friday. We both accepted this uncertainty and knew our trip would begin when it was supposed to. Thursday at 3pm we were told our truck was good to go and we picked it up, packed it up and headed out as planned Friday mid morning for DC and a fun visit with my college roommate. On the way down we received word from my husband’s brother that his mom’s situation may be shifting in her memory care residence in Florida. Simultaneously we received word from a friend that their sons college baseball schedule had shifted and we would not catch his game on Saturday in DC. Ok so day 1 traveling and more uncertainty! So off we went to our 2nd stop in NC to visit friends on the beach. Amazing, easy drive and wonderful time with them and their son, daughter in law and grandson. Another glitch, oil leaking here! Uncertainty, wanting it a certain way, wanting life on my terms all flooded back for an instant. However, another shift and pivot - our friend here also has a Ford and is very friendly with the owner of the dealership so they took us in and have been working on our truck. Last night we should have moved on to stop #3, friends in Kiawah but that was not to be the path. We are “stuck” here waiting for the truck. “Stuck” in parenthesis because we are here with dear friends, a complete health nut of a friend and active friends. So “stuck” looks like this: we are in a beautiful house on the beach, doing yoga, taking long walks, saunas, workouts, golf and amazing healthy meals. Our time delayed is having us skip our Kiawah stop, and although I am disappointed it will make us drive a bit further south for our next stop in places I have never been and am excited to see - Savannah and St Augustine. As it stands now our timeline should still work to meet one of our sons, a dear friend and a sister to play golf in Florida and go to the very cool TGL golf outing. (Plugging TGL here for my son who is an employee lol.) After that visit we had planned to make our way to the panhandle and Texas for a timely visit, however I continue to be served patience and acceptance as my husbands mom’s situation is in the forefront our our mind and more important than any plan we make. I know they say we make plans and God laughs at them and we have said all along we need to take this trip and its itinerary loosely. However this seems a little over the top hahaha. We said that because we wanted to leave the door open for detours if we were near something we wanted to see or if we wanted to linger at a spot, not because we would have car issues and possible family health issues.
So as usual I have 2 ways to look at life. I can be bitter, annoyed and anxious without accepting how life is unfolding for us right now. What the heck we have had 2 stops of many and already each stop has had a change of plan. That can be annoying as hell! However, I am choosing “path B” in my mind: gratitude - we stayed with my college roommate in DC and had a great visit. We are now in NC with amazing friends and they have the same brand truck so we were able to get in for service quickly. God willing we still make it to Fl to see Jack and go to TGL live with my sister. If not… I have to trust. God is certainly testing my patience and flexibility muscle. Stay tuned, if we don’t leave by Friday I am going to need another infusion of acceptance and trust!

I just looked over the side of my chair and found this teabag: “There is pleasure in the pathless woods.” Lord Byron - PERFECT!!!! I told my husband just now that is going to be our motto for these 7 weeks.

I love certainty and plans, but that is not reality. Pema Chodren in her book, When Things Fall Apart, talks about the key to living is living in the uncertainty comfortably. Patience, trust and embracing not knowing keep coming up and only a few days into this journey, maybe, just maybe this will be my gift of this trip and a shift I can bring into my whole life.

I found this in my notes from a few years ago on acceptance -
IT’S OK TO NOT ALWAYS BE STRONG
It’s ok to acknowledge that it’s harder than you thought it would be.
Because doubt has to be dealt with and purged sometimes.
Sometimes we need a moment to breath and feel our uncertainty and to taste our fear.
Sometimes we all need that.
So we can then let it go.
JM Storm

And finally the acceptance prayer:
And acceptance is the answer to all my problems today. When I am disturbed, it is because I find some person, place, thing or situation - some fact of my life - unacceptable to me. I can find no serenity until I accept that person, place, thing or situation as being exactly the way it is supposed to be at this moment. Nothing, absolutely nothing, happens in God’s world by mistake. Unless I accept life completely on life’s terms, I cannot be happy. I need to concentrate not so much on what needs to be changed in the world as on what needs to be changed in me and my attitudes.

I am going to leave you with yet another amazing reading from Melody Beattie in an effort to time all of this into our intention so for the last week of February we will all continue to carve out time alone.…
“There Is Power in Stillness: Our miracles and life’s magic don’t appear when we’re restless and frantic. The miracles and magic happen when we’re still, quiet, calm, and trusting. Each of us has favorite items and places that help to calm and quiet us. What stills our mind? A walk in the park, a special place in the city, a quiet room? An old chenille robe? A rock, a cross, a picture, a lit candle? Use these places and things to find that place of stillness in yourself. Find the power in stillness. It’s a power that comes gently, like the morning sunrise or the evening stars.
Take time each day to seek out stillness, to find that sacred spot. Let your mind and soul be at ease. Don’t grasp and grab for the magic and miracles. When you reside in that place of stillness, the joy, miracles, and magic you’re seeking will find you.

How is life flowing for you right now? Are you being challenged to accept any part of your life? Are you enjoying time by yourself? Stay tuned and pray we start making our way south soon!!!!! FYI, I am typing this from a sunny deck on the beach - enjoying spending time with myself and my dog while everyone else is out and about. Lucky me!!!!!